What Counts as a "Dating Relationship" Under Michigan Law

Under Michigan law, a "dating relationship" means "frequent, intimate associations primarily characterized by the expectation of affectional involvement." The term "does not include a casual relationship or an ordinary fraternization between 2 individuals in a business or social context."^[1] That definition, found in MCL 750.81(8)(a), decides whether an assault between two people who were never married, never lived together, and have no child together can be charged as domestic assault.^[2][1]

This page looks at each part of the definition, where else Michigan law uses it, what it leaves out, and how federal law has treated dating relationships since 2022.

The definition, phrase by phrase

The statute gives one sentence of definition and one sentence of exclusion.^[1] Neither sets a minimum number of dates, a minimum length of time, or a requirement that the relationship be sexual or exclusive.^[1]

Phrase	What the wording asks
"frequent"[1]	How often the two people associated. The statute gives no number.
"intimate associations"[1]	The closeness of the association. The statute does not define "intimate."
"primarily characterized by the expectation of affectional involvement"[1]	What the two people expected of the relationship: affection, as opposed to business or ordinary social contact.
"does not include a casual relationship"[1]	A casual relationship is outside the definition.
"or an ordinary fraternization between 2 individuals in a business or social context"[1]	Ordinary business or social contact, such as between coworkers, classmates, or friends, does not by itself meet the definition.

Jurors hear nearly the same words. The model jury instruction for domestic assault tells them that a dating relationship "means frequent, intimate association primarily characterized by the expectation of affectional involvement" and that it "does not include a casual relationship or an ordinary fraternization between two individuals in a business or social context."^[6]

The sources used for this guide (the statute, the model jury instructions, and the benchbook used by Michigan judges) do not identify an appellate decision that draws the line between a "casual" relationship and a dating relationship, so this page does not state one. In an individual case the question is decided on the evidence about that relationship.

A past dating relationship counts

MCL 750.81(2) covers "an individual with whom the individual has or has had a dating relationship."^[2] The Court of Appeals has summarized the statute as defining an assault as domestic if the two people "have ever had a dating relationship."^[7] The statute puts no limit on how long ago the relationship ended.^[2]

One detail is worth knowing if you read the benchbook itself: its block quotation of the subsection prints "has had a dating relationship," while the current statute reads "has or has had."^[2] The statute's wording controls.

Where Michigan law uses this definition

The same definition, in the same or nearly the same words, appears in the other Michigan statutes in this table.^[1][8][3]

Area of law	Statute	What the dating relationship does there
Domestic assault	MCL 750.81(2), (8)(a)	One of four relationships that make an assault a domestic assault[2][1]
Aggravated domestic assault	MCL 750.81a(2)	One of the same four relationships[9]
Arrest without a warrant	MCL 764.15a	One of the relationships that allows a warrantless arrest for domestic assault[10][8]
Deferral	MCL 769.4a(1)	One of the relationships that makes the deferral available[9]
Personal protection orders	MCL 600.2950(1), (30)(a)	One of the relationships that allows a domestic relationship PPO[11][3]
Stalking, domestic version	MCL 750.411h(2)(c)	One of the relationships in the domestic stalking subdivision added February 13, 2024[12]
Statutory definition of domestic violence	MCL 400.1501	A person in a current or past dating relationship is a "family or household member"[13]

For the full list of relationships and how they compare, see Who is covered: the domestic relationship. For PPOs, see Types of PPOs in Michigan; a person who does not fit any domestic relationship can still seek a stalking PPO, which needs no relationship at all.^[14]

What the definition leaves out

The statute names two exclusions: a casual relationship, and ordinary fraternization between two individuals in a business or social context.^[1]

It also does not treat a sexual relationship as its own category. MCL 400.1501(e) lists "an individual with whom the person is or has engaged in a sexual relationship" separately from a person in a dating relationship, but the domestic assault statute has only four categories and a sexual relationship is not one of them.^[13][2] Under MCL 750.81(2), then, the question is still whether the association met the dating relationship definition, or whether another category, such as a shared household or a child in common, applies.^[2][1]

If no category applies, the assault is not domestic assault. It is still a crime: ordinary assault or assault and battery under MCL 750.81(1) is a misdemeanor punishable by up to 93 days, a fine of up to $500, or both.^[15]

Who has to prove the relationship?

The prosecutor. The relationship is the second element of domestic assault, and the prosecutor must prove each element beyond a reasonable doubt.^[16][17] The accused is not required to prove that the relationship was casual.^[18]

Because the definition is about frequency and expectation, it points to ordinary facts about how two people spent their time, such as how often they saw each other and how they described the relationship. How that element is contested is covered in Challenging the domestic relationship element, and how messages are used in court is covered in Text messages and social media evidence.

How federal law treats dating relationships after 2022

Federal law makes it unlawful for anyone convicted in any court of a "misdemeanor crime of domestic violence" to possess a firearm or ammunition.^[19] Before 2022 the federal definition of that term did not mention dating partners. The Bipartisan Safer Communities Act, enacted June 25, 2022, added "a person who has a current or recent former dating relationship with the victim."^[4]

Three features of the federal rule differ from Michigan's.

• It is not retroactive. The 2022 amendment does not apply to any conviction of a misdemeanor crime of domestic violence entered before June 25, 2022.^[4]
• It has its own definition. Under 18 USC 921(a)(37), a dating relationship is a relationship between individuals "who have or have recently had a continuing serious relationship of a romantic or intimate nature," judged by its length, its nature, and the frequency and type of interaction. A casual acquaintanceship or ordinary fraternization in a business or social context is not one.^[5]
• It can end after five years for a single conviction. A person with not more than one conviction for a misdemeanor crime of domestic violence against a dating partner, who is not otherwise prohibited, is no longer disqualified once 5 years have passed from the later of the judgment of conviction or completion of any custodial or supervisory sentence, provided there is no later disqualifying conviction.^[20] That restoration is not available where the offender was a current or former spouse, parent, or guardian of the victim, shares a child with the victim, or lives or has lived with the victim as a spouse, parent, or guardian.^[20]

Question	Michigan (MCL 750.81)	Federal firearm law (18 USC 921)
Core wording	"frequent, intimate associations primarily characterized by the expectation of affectional involvement"[1]	"a continuing serious relationship of a romantic or intimate nature"[5]
Past relationships	"has or has had" a dating relationship[2]	"current or recent former" dating relationship[21]
What is excluded	A casual relationship or ordinary fraternization in a business or social context[1]	A casual acquaintanceship or ordinary fraternization in a business or social context[5]
Since when	The definition is in the current text of the statute[1]	Convictions entered on or after June 25, 2022[4]

Michigan has its own firearm rule that does not depend on the federal one. A conviction under MCL 750.81(2) is a "misdemeanor involving domestic violence" under Michigan law, and the person may not possess a firearm or ammunition in Michigan until 8 years after paying all fines, serving all terms of imprisonment, and completing all conditions of probation.^[22][23] The Michigan ban took effect February 13, 2024.^[24] See Michigan's 8-year gun ban and The federal lifetime gun ban.

What people get wrong

"We were never official, so it is not domestic." The statute does not ask whether the two people used a label. It asks about frequent, intimate associations and the expectation of affectional involvement.^[1]

"It ended long ago, so it does not count." Michigan's assault statute covers a person with whom the accused "has had" a dating relationship.^[2]

"Any hookup makes it domestic violence." A casual relationship is expressly excluded from the definition.^[1]

"If it is not a dating relationship, there is no charge." An assault outside the four domestic categories is still punishable under MCL 750.81(1).^[15] The underlying statute is explained in Domestic assault: MCL 750.81 explained.